I am the elusive female geek. Sometimes referred to as a geek girl or gamer girl...which I guess for some brings out connotations of short shorts, pigtails, lolipops, and some loose reference to gaming or nerd culture. Other times labeled as a girl geek or girl gamer...whose connotation is simply a female version of the highly prevalent male version of the species. Whichever terminology please you, it should come as no surprise to the well-versed that all this really means is that I am among those who "geek out" over a variety of niche culture creations. I am part of fandoms. I love RPGs. I play video games. I get giddy about good fantasy and sci fi movies, shows, and books. I occasionally
lurk on social media sites and politely stalk my favorite actors, writers, and
creators. I admit there is occasional squeeing involved in these endeavors, but
what’s the fun if you can’t get excited about it?
When did I know that I was a geek? That’s a good question.
As a kid I was simply a nerd, because I was relatively intelligent and I enjoyed
school. I was a bit shy compared to the people around me and instead of
gravitating to the “popular” kids, I often befriended the slightly offbeat or
different youngsters. I don’t think I was making a conscious effort to be
different myself, they were just more interesting. My mother was a bit of an
offbeat person herself and I can honestly say that her interest in vampires,
horror, costumes, and makeup helped to spur my curiosity in alternate
directions. She introduced me to authors like Anne Rice and P.N. Elrod, which
eventually led me towards Dean Koontz and the occasional Stephen King novel.
All of this brought me to my first love…vampires. Oh those
wickedly seductive creatures of the night! How I wanted to meet one, be seduced
by one, and perhaps become one. Probably not a very realistic life goal, but I
was entranced by them. The first vampire television shows I remember watching
included a redux version of Dark Shadows and the adapted-from-an-RPG series
Kindred: The Embraced. Granted, neither of those lasted very long, but they did
manage to tease my voracious appetite. The one that turned the tide for me
though, was when Joss Whedon made his true vision for Buffy the Vampire Slayer
a reality and it came to life as a weekly television ritual. Now, I had seen
the movie version and I went in ready to completely dislike the television show,
but I had to give it a chance…it was about vampires! Needless to say, I was
pleasantly surprised and found myself addicted to this unique world and its
insanely flawed but lovable characters.
The main character, a troubled teenager with an absent
father figure who just wanted to be normal struck a chord with me and I
followed her life adventures as they seemed to mimic my own. From the failed
romantic relationships to the death of her mother, I shared a bond with this
character and her triumphs and setbacks. Now, I can’t say that Buffy was
initially my primary reason for watching the show. In the very beginning, it
was actually the mysterious man lurking in the shadows who kept me tuning in
through that first season when Buffy was really gaining her footing. From the
moment he arrived with his silver cross and cryptic warnings, I was hooked. I
tuned in every week just to see if we would learn something more about the
handsome, taciturn stranger named Angel.
As I continue to explore new worlds and stories, this seems
to be a theme…that one character that hooks me in and keeps me around so that
I’m willing to learn more about the rest of the world that surrounds them.
Usually I’m pretty glad that I did.
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